I'm not ready!!!

I have a confession. 

My baby will be starting school in a few weeks and I'm NOT ready!!!

I mean we are prepared and have everything we need but I'm just not mentally ready for this next step.  It's crazy to think that Aaron is 5 and will be getting on a school bus. I just can't believe it! I have always looked forward to when Aaron would be heading off to school.  I guess I'm just a little taken back on how quickly we got here. 

Despite being a little down about this next step, I'm really excited for him to start school! He will be learning lots of new things and building long-term relationships that he may have forever. I just need to come to the realization that my baby is no longer a baby :-( This is the moment I break down!!! I don't know why it's so hard for me! I'm not ready for him to grow up! I guess I better get it together and FAST! I only have a few weeks left to get in the right mindset. 

 OK....breakdown over....

Okay, emotional rant over! I think I got it all out well until I actually send him on his merry way. Praying that I will be strong enough to fight back tears on that first day. I don't want Aaron to see me sad. It's just life....we learn, live, and grow! So what is there really to be afraid of??? I think for me personally seeing Aaron grow over the years has made me realize that life is always moving regardless if you are ready or not. 

I remember a few days before Aaron was born....I wasn't ready to be a mom but at the same time I wanted him out of my belly! I had morning sickness all throughout my pregnancy and I was exhausted!  Well, the moment I laid eyes on Aaron I was in awe. ...I was speechless!  I remember my mom telling me to say hello! Like every new mother I had to get accustomed to my new lifestyle but I've enjoyed it so much!I wouldn't go back and change a thing if I could.

Aaron and I have been through so much and he has grown tremendously!  At one point I thought our life was going to be controlled by his EE disorder but we've overcome that. I may not be ready but I know that Aaron is ready and honestly that's all that matters. I have no worries that he will do very well in his first year of elementary school. 


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